iodized
How to completely destroy a video game
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Step 1. Download “Return of the Mack” by Mark Morrison here.

Step 2. Put it on your iPod, computer, or whatever your foolish ass plays music with.

Step 3. Put it on repeat. Destroy whatever game you are playing.

I have myself tested this on Tetris DX, scoring 238,328 on the first try (80,000 higher than my previous high score). This may work on other things such as cooking, cross stitching, water polo, wakeboarding, etc. I haven’t yet tested it on anything else, but please report back if it helps with any other activities.

The rekt.net podcast - Minisode 02 - Warheads
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In this episode of the rekt.net minicast I decide to eat five Warhead candies at once. With disastrous results.

Direct download here. Audio player may work incorrectly for some. In the meantime use the direct download or iTunes links.

Subscribe: iTunes

Youtube Bonanza
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Here’s a round-up of some of the most interesting and odd videos that I’ve come across and others that have been posted to the forums.

 

Here some crazy Finnish band with a lead singer with enough McDonald’s colors to make your eyes bleed. They cover “Sweet Home Alabama”.

 

Everybody want a piece of my chicken. Southern fried chicken. Finger lickin’. That’s all that needs to be said.

 

Although not a real video, this is the song “Let Me Smell Yo Dick” by Riskay. This is a story of her confronting her cheating man-friend. By smelling his dick.

 

TECHNOVIKING DOES NOT DANCE TO THE MUSIC. THE MUSIC DANCES TO TECHNOVIKING.

 

Some insane church preaches about how Barack Obama is a LONG LEGGED MACK DADDY then goes on to talk about 54D’s. DOUBLE-D’S! And apparently his “African in-heat father” hooked up with his mother (who is white), so apparently he was BORN TRASH.

 

Some Swedish guy instructs you on how to perform the ULTIMATE SUICIDE. By taking pills, drinking some firewater, cutting his wrists, lighting himself on fire, shooting himself in the head, hanging himself, blowing himself up, then falling into freezing water which would cause him to drown and/or freeze to death.

The rekt.net Minicast Episode 01 - Ball Pits
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In this episode of the rekt.net minicast we discuss ball pits. Pits of balls.

Chopped and screwed by Senator Burrub.

Direct download here. Audio player may work incorrectly for some. In the meantime use the direct download or iTunes links.

Subscribe: iTunes

The Diaries of Jeffeburg - Episode Two
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We are proud to bring you the second installment of The Diaries of Jeffeburg. In today’s episode of the saga, Jeffeburg finds himself plowing into a country club tree while raising all sorts of hell.

Narrated by Phenton Gazelle.

The audio player may work incorrectly for some. In the meantime use the direct download or iTunes links.

Download it here.

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The Diaries of Jeffeburg - Episode One
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Today the rekt.net podcast brings you the first edition of The Diaries of Jeffeburg entitled Jeffeburg Breaks the Law.. of Speed.

Narrated by Phenton Gazelle.

Subscribe: iTunes

rektdawtnet
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Senator Burrub presents a song by Twin Genius: rektdawtnet.
Its a dedication to rekt.net.

With beats and mixing by: ngoro
Vocals by: khuk
Copyright 2008 Twin Genius

Please do enjoy and look forward to the first release from the two:

Twin Genius: Burgeon

The rekt.net podcast: Episode 00
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Today we bring to you the debut of the rekt.net podcast with Episode 00. Senator Burrub and I discuss the latest happenings from the geography of Asia and Europe to Dewey Natural.

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New rekt…. e-rekted.
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If you haven’t noticed, rekt is back and looks a little different than before. No more blank pages with nothing but a link to elsewhere. We’re bringing this shit back in full effect. Expect regular posts from Flapjack Daniels and I. Plus we’ll be recruiting a few select people to write for us. If you think you can write decent material for us, get in touch. You know how.

Along with the articles, we’re going to start doing podcasts on a semi regular basis once we get into the swing of things and Ask rekt will return monthly.

The forums are still at dongsmugglers for the time being, and may stay that way for a while since it works. If it ain’t broke.. don’t fix it they say. We may migrate the data and host them at rekt at some point in the future. It will be a seamless transition.

Expect big things from us, you don’t even know the half of what else we have planned.

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