Corn Dogs

We are going to be making corndogs today. It's a delicacy of the frozen food section, but they are better and cheaper to make at home, and it gives you the opportunity to learn how to make a basic cornmeal based batter.

EDIBLE ROLLCALL



Vegetable Oil (for deep fryer)
1/2 cup All-Purpose Flour (for flouring hot dogs)
2/3 cup Cornmeal
1/3 cup All-Purpose Flour
1 teaspoon Salt
1/2 cup Milk
1 Egg
2 tablespoons Vegetable Oil
10 Hot Dogs
10 Wooden Poking Sticks (found in the crafts section of wal-mart)

Heat that deep fryer to Fahrenheit 375 (76 degrees less than book burning temperature)

Place Cornmeal, 1/3 cup Flour and Salt into a mixing bowl

Whisk these dry ingredients together (we use two strategically arranged forks in lieu of a whisk)

Pre-Whisk


Post-Whisk


Beat an egg. Beat it long, beat it hard.

Add the beaten egg, 2 tablespoons Vegetable Oil and the Milk into the dry ingredients.



Whisk that shit again until it gets nice and thick like grits.



Now you have invented batter. Profligate it.

Next, we sodomize the hot dogs.

Innocent Hotdogs


Sodomite Hotdogs



Pour a half cup of flour out on a baking tray.



Roll the sodomized hot dogs over the flour until they obtain sufficient wintry camouflage.



Batter Dip your corndogs. We used the "Hot Dog Down a Hallway" method, but it may be easier to pour the batter out onto a flat surface.



It's frying time. Be careful to space your corn dogs out better than this.



Throw the raw dogs into your fryer for about three minutes.



If you space your corn dogs haphazardly, they will look like this.



But if you place them hazardly, they will look perfect, as such.



Place carefully on your plate with a delicious side.



Consume.



I suggest making these in bulk, so they can be frozen and consumed at multiple times. This recipe makes ten Corn Dogs, and it costs about $3.00.